auntie pixelante

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fuck you

so in case this is the last thing i ever post here this is my fancy website with all of my neat games and my portfolio and stuff.

new game. so yeah, that's what i've mostly been doing since being back in new york. an writing. and a little bit of graphic design. and eating meat and dairy.

and planning to move to california.

start spreading the news
i've leaving today
i've been too long apart from it
NEW YORK, NEW YORK

these vagabond shoes
are starting to fray
i'm ready to depart for it
NEW YORK, NEW YORK

i wanna wake up in a city
not this texan wasteland
there's so little out here
i feel like i'm in OUTER SPACE, MAN

these shitty town blues
are melting away
gonna make a brand new start of it
in old new york!

little livejournal, i havn't updated you in a while, have i? i havn't had a lot of free time, i guess. and i guess that's no longer a problem.

the school kicked me out for having ideas. ideas are apparently dangerous. i don't know what to say about it that i havn't already said.

i bought my computer from the school and put a new portfolio together. it's a work in progress and i've only had three days to work on it. i havn't mentioned i started a new blog, have i? oh, livejournal, i keep you so out of the loop.

i'm moving back to new york in a month, though i'm scared i may end up never leaving. then i start looking for work, preferably work that will take me to the bay area.

i am tired, scared, and relieved.

i've been working on this game in my spare time, between my classes, because i refuse to believe that it takes two hundred people to make a videogame. this game was made by three: james harvey, andrew toups, and myself.

it's called mighty jill off and i'm super proud of it.

my first semester of classes is over and it's my birthday. a year ago i was getting on a plane to california for the first time; this weekend i'm flying out there to be with the woman i love. i've come a long way in a year, and it's been a hell of a struggle, but it's struggle that gives life meaning and i am proud to fight every day of my life.

i am putting the finishing touches on a game i made in my own time, without any help from my school, while doing all of my class projects and maintaining high grades in all of my classes. i feel potent and capable. the game will be out tomorrow, then it's off to the bay area. she is waiting in the air.

thump

thump

THIS WALL WILL BREAK BEFORE I DO

thump

thump

industry industry industry industry textures industry industry world of warcraft

industry

texas is weird.

school is weird.

i'm one of very few students to get in without an undergraduate degree, apparently.

this weekend is weird, because i have so little to do. i'm ahead in all the readings in all my classes.

they gave me a six thousand dollar laptop so new that no one outside of my class has used one yet. i've barely touched it.

my apartment is so big. it feels a bit empty without my slut here.

i miss her. we may be undertaking a more serious commitment soon.

we rescued a mirror with a studded black leather frame from the clearance floor of a furniture warehouse. what a perv i am.

i am restless. i want school to start again.

i live in texas now.

new yorkers who want to see me before i leave need to get on my case right away.

i went to the lsm "season's beatings" party to say goodbye. a friend gave me a set of anal beads she got in the grab bag as a going-away present (i didn't participate in the grab bag cause i'm a cheapo) (they're actually quality anal beads, the kind that are a single connected piece instead of a bunch of beads on a flimsy string). as i was leaving i heard lolita wolf yelling "who got my butt beads?!" i turned around to peak back in the party but the conversation had moved on. i turned back. dammit.

the slut is getting a dog, a big dog. i have an irrational childhood fear of big dogs. i will get over it somehow.

back in new york, to pack my things and say goodbye. on the twenty-seventh i'm flying down to plano. my parents are flying down with me and renting a car. we're going to meet the slut there. that should be interesting. blah blah blah videogame school.

hello people who read my livejournal. you're my favorites. i figured you might want to see how ridiculous my hair is or my new glasses. here they are:



i have an apartment in plano, texas now. i am moving in on the twenty-seventh. the slut is joining me for new year's. then i am going to do the student thing for a while. for about seventeen months, to be accurate.

leaving for california in two days!

igf finalists are announced monday. if i'm one of them, you'll hear about it.

my sister's sweet sixteen was yesterday. we reenacted the lightsaber battle from star wars. i yelled you fight like a dairy farmer! and she countered how appropriate! you fight like a cow! then, while i was stunned by her insult, she struck me. i conceded defeat, bowed, and thus was the torch passed to the new generation.

i'm going to stay for thanksgiving with my family, then i'm going back to california. then back to new york for the holiday, then, if all goes well, i'll be moving into my new place in plano, texas, and the slut is going to fly out and spend new year's with me. i just applied for the apartment. wish me luck.

there's a play party tonight. the theme is "women in prison", and though this might be my last opportunity to see some of the local leatherwomen (and though i'm amused by the theme), i don't think i'm going to go. i think i'm going to stay in my bed and play videogames and think about warm days to come.

so california was lovely, as it has always been to me. i visited a pinball museum, mr. s leather, and the sunnyvale golf center arcade. i got to see alice, and to dress up as a bubble-blowing dinosaur for a videogame party:



( click for some more pictures. )

getting to spend time with the slut was the best thing about the week. i love her very much, and left her with a sore ass and the promise that she would see me again in dallas. this past week i found out i was accepted to the school.

while i was away, the clock turned back an hour, my sister turned sixteen, and my mother turned fifty.

the slut and i also took a few photos for my ongoing gameboy camera fetish photo project.

new york again. it is cold and rainy and miserable. i left a woman i love in a place that is bright and warm and beautiful. this morning, sitting at my feet, she asked me why i had to leave. i told her it was because i have responsibilities. (like fighting a lightsaber duel with my sister at her sweet sixteen party next week.) i told her she would see me again, and she made me pinky swear.

i'll post pictures later.

tomorrow i'm getting on a plane for california. san jose. santa clara. san francisco. i left my heart there, you know. six hours in the air, one week with the fabulous woman i am completely proud to call my slut.

UPDATE: in california, safe and sound.

the new game is out. it's for two players: player one is a snake who tried to eat an apple, and player two is the apple.

i like heroine sheik's reading of portal as queer. though i'm skeptical of some of the conclusions it draws, i love portal, and i love dykes.

on that note, just ten days until i go to california to spend a week with my slut.

i saw lee harrington speak today. he's not as infamous as midori, but he's one of my idols, so he gets a post. he spoke about invocation and evocation as it relates to bdsm role-play.

he's a bear shaman, too. the other night i dreamt i got into the videogame school, but i couldn't major in just videogames. i had to major in bear shamanism and videogames.

if i could possibly hear from the school sometime soon re: acceptance, that would be lovely.